The End
by Fuuei
Summary: Gojyo's D.E.A.D. What will the others do? Continue? By the way... They are all in absolutely BAD conditions right now... Want to make them feel better? Read and review!
1. Sorrow

Fuuei: I've done some revisions and so uhh… Here you go!

Sanzo: What kind of stupid introduction is that?

Fuuei: Nya, shut up… By the way… I think you all know who's dying already, right? And I don't own no no Saiyuki.

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The End Sorrow 

Tick. Tick. _What is that sound? What is that liquid that touched my lips and tasted brackish? Sweat? Tears? I can't open my eyes. Arghh! What was that? Why… why do I feel so much pain? Ittai…what's happening to me? Why can't my eyes open? Come on, what's going on? I want to see what's happening! Go on! Continue! Open up! I don't want to go in a slumber!_

His crimson eyes suddenly bulged out and glanced around him. Sanzo was leaning against the wall near the door, smoking, grunting, cursing and he looked like he was in a foul mood. The hanyou heard some sobs very near him and he wondered who could it be? He tried to turn around but the pain in his neck prevented him to do so.

"Go… jyo…" and the speaker continued on crying. _What? Is it Hakkai? Why… why is he crying? What has happened to you, my dear friend? I… I want to see your face, but why can't I move even a muscle? Why are you so sad? Where is that baka saru with his usual "Harahetta's"? Arghh! _With that last thought, Gojyo started to turn to the other side, or rather **tossed **himself to the other side of the bed.

His body was shuddering and sweating profusely. He tossed himself to the left, then to the right side of the bed. After a while or two, a scream made its way out of his throat. The youkai with the monocle suddenly came back to reality from crying after hearing that excruciating scream. "Goyjo? You're awake!" He said out loud with bolt from the blue and distress when he saw how Gojyo was being tortured by his own fate.

"**AAAAAHHHHHH**!" The scream broke through the soundless and anguished morning. Suddenly a teenage boy with beautiful golden orbs came rushing to the scarlet-haired man. "Go… Gojyo! Daijoubu desuka?" His question came out sincere and apprehensive. Not long after his words came out, tears came brimming in his eyes. "Goyjo…" He cried while wiping the tears off his face, trying his best not to worry the hanyou, or rather partly his o-nii-chan.

Even the cold Sanzo Houshi-sama went near him and stopped his smoking. His eyes carried a glance of sorrow and he let out a "Ch!" He stood there, speechless, eyes meeting with the red-hair's. About a minute or two later, he walked away with a "K'so!" Though he did not show how he cared, the others still knew that he could not accept the unbearable truth.

_Sanzo? Hakkai? Goku? Why are you all acting so eccentrically? Goku, how come today you aren't calling me ero gokiburi or ero kappa? You also aren't saying your best line, "Harahetta!" This couldn't be true, you aren't arguing with me nor feeling hungry? Are you sick, kono baka saru? Why are you crying? There must be something wrong with you._    

_This is strange, why you, namaguza bouzu, why you faced me and walk away with a glimpse of sympathy? Huh!? You even stopped smoking when you came near me! You are weird, definitely weird, just like the baka saru. I guess you got too much influence from him. You were never like this before. Or is it you got too much migraine?_

_Hakkai… Oh no, not you, too. What are you so sad about? Is it because I'm stuck to the bed or something? Why can't you cease your crying? What's wrong with you? Why can't my voice come out and ask you about it? My… my voice, my voice! Have I gone dumb? Hakkai! Please, please tell me why you are crying so sadly? Hak…kai… _

"Hugghhh… Haghhhhhh…" Gojyo's breathing got feeble and more difficult. _Damn it! What's happening with me!? Why am I so weak today? _"Gojyo… please don't die! Hold on! I promise I will never be hungry again if you can survive!!! I'm sure I'll never fight with you again! Iie! I don't want you to leave!!! No!" However, these words hardly came out between his sobs. "It's all my fault…"

NANI!? NANDATO!? I…I am going to be dead? Arghh! The pain! Why can't I breathe? NANDE!!!!! I don't want to die yet… I still haven't found the true love of my own. No… don't leave me, I love this world, don't leave me! NOOOOOO!!!!!

_Goku… Will you stop sobbing already? You are wetting me. Why aren't you calling me ero kappa for Pete's sake!? Please, call me that even if it is the last time; I can't bear with the sad you. If only my voice can come out, I will definitely call you as my brother. Otooto… I never have this chance to tell you how cute and lovable you are, that I really want to be your o-nii-chan. I really regret…why didn't I capture the slightest chance to call you as my otooto? Oh God, please call him to stop now. I can't bear to look at his wet face anymore. It just makes my pain boost up. Please… otooto, don't cry…One… gai…_

_Sanzo… Don't think that I can't see you. Even though I am dying, I still can see your face through the ajar door. What, what exactly are you doing? Smoking, and… drinking beer!? You've even drunk dozens of them! You'll go mad if you continue that! Or have you gone mad already? Because of me? This is crazy. This is absolutely insane. Shoot. Why are these stupid baka damned tears stinging me now? Sanzo, don't go mad because of me… I thought you have always wanted to get rid of me? No, Sanzo, I hate to admit, but you are definitely an important friend, a treasure to me. So please, stop now. Yamete kudasai. I… I can't see you go mad because of me. Iieeeeee…_

_Hakkai… Ah, my dearest friend of all. The one whom I can never stop trusting. I know how hard it is to lose a friend of yours, especially when he is an important one, because I am having the same feeling now. Don't cry, my friend… No, don't cry… Tell me why your tears are blue, and how to stop them too. I dislike the way you smile never-endingly, but I **hate** the way you're crying ad infinitum. I want to see you smile again… please don't cry, you are also making me so sad too. _

No… why are these tears coming down like rivers? Shoot. They won't stop… 

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Fuuei: Hope you all like it!

Gojyo: You're so bad!!! T_T Y_Y

Fuuei: Ahahah! Sorry, ne… But you're such a good actor! Readers, if you have any questions or suggestions or flames to give me… Don't hesitate to email or review me! Jaa na!


	2. Guilt

Disclaimer: I do not own Saiyuki.

Fuuei: The second chapter of The End! Guilt is here!!! Okay, this chapter is quite or should I say, almost all Sanzo-centric. I mean… It's like what he feels about Gojyo and uhh… he's like blaming himself…

Sanzo: I DO NOT!!!

Fuuei: Don't be shy! Aww… come on… Oh, by the way… For those people who think that the Goku and Gojyo brother relationship is little bit weird… I'll tell you all why I did that… Well, in Tenkai, Goku used to call him Ken-nii-chan, right? So isn't it QUITE the same when he was reincarnated??? I mean, even though he's Gojyo, not Kenren… It's still the same right? Okay, I present to you… The End: 2nd Chapter, Guilt!!!!!

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**The End** Guilt 

_Gojyo… If time could be turned back, I wish I did not argue with you. It is my entire fault that you are laying on the bed now, motionless. If the last argue had never happened, you would never be like this. Oh, how I wish to die! Gojyo, I'm sorry… But I guess these words will never reach you anymore… I'm sorry, Gojyo, I know that you would never like to see me in tears, but I just can't hold them back no matter how… Honto ni gomenasai, Gojyo… iya, o… nii-chan…_

_Ch! I don't care a damn about you… But why, is there a sense of guilt and pain within me? It's like I have another heart, which keeps on blaming me for your death. The other "me" keeps on saying that if I did not fire that gun, this whole tragedy could never happen. So, it's really me, huh? The one who gave you your last destiny… Heck, after all, I still say I don't care about you… Guess it was a lie… for me._

_Baka! Baka! Baka! Baka! Why was I so stupid and careless? If only I did not lose control of Hakuryu when Sanzo fired his gun… If only I could heal the poison out of nowhere which covered your body… If only we could reach a town earlier… All of this would never happen. Why? Why was I so helpless and useless when I was the one needed most at that time? I didn't have the power to save Kanna at that time, and now, I couldn't save you either. I hate myself…  _

            Now, in front of the incomplete Sanzo-ikkou, is Sha Gojyo, the happy-go-lucky guy in the group, lying on the bed. But his face no longer contained any happiness nor pain, as he is no longer that world's inhabitant. In front of him, is the coldest Sanzo ever found in the world, eyes narrowing, and does not dare to face him, even if he is dead. Beside him are both the man with monocle and brother whom he never has the chance to call him as his _otooto. _ 

            Goku obscured his head on to the blanket and shed tears, wetting the blanket. He was shuddering like crazy, but not out of cold. Worse than Goku, Hakkai's eyes were totally blank. He looked at Gojyo's corpse and tears flowed down his cheeks like rivers. They never bring to a halt and he never has the attempt to cease them. Sanzo could not stand the sorrow and anguish air anymore. Moreover, he could not stand the sense of guilt within him whenever he saw Goku and Hakkai, and of course, Gojyo. 

            _Another one whom I could not protect. _Sanzo thought as he was smoking and drinking in the bar. He struggled to hide that sense of guiltiness and grief by drinking, but no matter how many times the alcoholic liquid surges down into his throat, he was not drunk. His heart throbbed with pain whenever he thought about the scene when Gojyo was taken away to the other world. 

            _Gojyo's face was a mixture of tears. It was not clear whether they were his, Hakkai's or Goku's. His eyes were plain and blank. His body moved up and down furiously as he was heaving heavily. He was obviously gasping for air as he was suffocating. Suddenly he opened his eyes wide. His eyes were as if going to pop out as he looked from Goku, then to Sanzo, and finally to Hakkai. His eyes seemed to glow like beautiful red rubies whenever his tears reflected the sun's rays._

            At last, he glanced at Sanzo and forced the words out of his mouth. He had to say it to Sanzo, as Sanzo was the calmest and yet the most understanding one of all whenever these kinds of tragedies happen. "Continue this… unghh… journey without me… one--- Arghh!!!" With that, he tossed himself to the left, then to the right. He closed his eyes tight, as if fearing to see the people around him. Eventually, he stopped. He took a final glance at the other three and smiled a smile, which showed the message "I'm sorry… Really sorry." 

_            "Gai." Sanzo said as he stared at Gojyo's body, with a sympathetic look, also full with mourning and agony. _You haven't even finished your sentence yet, and you died. And yet, you call us to continue this journey. How can we continue with an always crying hypocrite and a wet saru? You really are irresponsible, you know that? _Sanzo thought, but he did not meant to complain to him. He had the feeling that his heart stopped beating. He clutched his robe and felt that his heart throbbed with regret and pain. He was as if dying from anguish and guilt.  _

_Humph, irresponsible, dead ero kappa. How can you do this to us?  _

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Fuuei: Okay… I'm going to make the whole Sanzo-ikkou die in this fic… So please don't be angry with me… Gojyo-fans… Don't chase me around like crazy, okay?

Sanzo: What!!! We're all gonnna die!?

Fuuei: Of course! And the last one who dies will suffer the most!!! And I've chosen!!! It will be either YOU or GOKU!!!

Goku & Sanzo: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Fuuei: Hehe… Please help me choose, ne? Either Goku or Sanzo… And also, please review! I need to know if there are mistakes and I also need to know your honest opinion! Jaa!


	3. Burial

Fuuei: Hi, I'm really sorry for the long delay but exams are coming so I've got to study hard… And as I type further about this fic, I realise how close the four of them are. Which reminds me of what happened today… Well, you see…

Hakkai: Ano… Please don't make it too long, ne…

Fuuei: Okay. As I was saying…

Sanzo: Oi, on with the story already!!!

Fuuei: Fine fine!!! And oh… Please choose again who you want to suffer the most… Because all of them are going to die… (HAHAH) so the last one to die will suffer the most. So… who will it be? Sanzo? Or Goku? Please choose wisely… And… Enjoy…

Disclaimer: If I own Saiyuki, Sanzo's hair would be orange in colour with purple and blue highlights…

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The End Burial 

            The sun started to set, dyeing the vast sky with a colour of scarlet, so beautiful… yet so sorrowful. It was as if Gojyo's body and spirit dissolved with the sunset and the sky. The red sun continued shining dully, without a hint of life and happiness. A figure walked out and his skin was shone dimly by the sad sun. His endless tears reflected the sun's rays, and they seemed to be like red rivers flowing from his eyes… Endless red rivers filled with blood…

            _This colour… Just like the blood flowing from his body, just like the colour of his eyes and hair… Just like the liquid slowly dripping from my heart within me… _He raised his head to the sky, catching a glimpse of the birds above him, flying in the air. _I wonder… Where are the birds flying off to as they freely slice through the wind? One can't return to the same place as it once was in days gone by. Yes, you will never return to us, never return to me again. Why… why are these tears keep flowing continuously without my permission? I can't… I'm too weak to suppress my sorrow from surfacing up… _

Night falls, and the red orb finally had the idea of stopping to persecute the poor man. Nevertheless, this did not stop him to lose that feeling, as Gojyo was still dead… The feeling was so certain that it had started to make him lose himself. The feeling… It was a feeling that made him wanting to suicide or torment himself inhumanly rather than having his close friend dead. He never thought this would ever happen… He knew that someone who takes other's life, at the same time must be prepared for his own life to be taken too… He really knew it, and was prepared for the worst. However, he never knew the target was his close friend… He never knew… this tragedy would come so fast.    

            Hakkai glanced out to the dark sky from his room with the others. Each and every time, he turned his head to look at Gojyo and that made him even more despondent. His tears were found on the windowsill, on Gojyo's body, and on his face. Goku, on the other hand, was also crying incessantly, but only more normally than how Hakkai showed his despair. Sanzo came back from the bar a few moments ago, but was not found crying or wailing. However, he was sobbing inaudibly in his heart… Yes, even he could not let go of Gojyo and accept the fact that he was dead.

            The three of them was in their worst condition. None of them wanted to eat or drink or sleep, and even Sanzo did not have the thought to smoke. The only things they did were remember, regret and cry. They were tantalizing themselves gradually and they were irrefutably wishing for death rather than having their close friend dead. _If only I can replace him… _They all thought. As they were glooming over his death, a swarm of flies was nearing them…

            Sanzo flinched, sensing the appearance of the 'flies'. He took a glimpse at Goku and Hakkai. Just as he had expected, they did not sense their presence. They were just too depressed to do anything. _They are too weak to fight now… Why are they choosing this time to appear? K'so! _Sanzo felt their presence nearer and nearer… He got his gun, preparing for the worst…

            SLAAAM! The door was banged open and the herd of youkais glanced at them. "You're Sanzo, right?" The leader asked Sanzo. "So what if I am?" Sanzo retorted coolly. Hakkai and Goku finally noticed the youkais in front of them. Goku showed a sign of disgust, maybe because choosing such a bad time to show up. He summoned his nyoibou, tears still streaming down his face, and stood up. Hakkai, however, did not show anyone sign of worry or anger. He just shifted back into his crying state again. _Youkais__… So what? I'm not afraid. Come and kill me. Maybe like that I can go with Gojyo and meet Kannan and him. I don't care… anymore…_

"Jin-sama, there's one person lying on the bed, probably dead." One of the youkaireported to the leader. "Eh? One is dead already? Hahahahah! Genjo Sanzo, you better prepare! With only two followers left, you think you can defeat me?" "Humph, try, if you dare…" The youkaileader, namely Jin, pointed his finger towards Sanzo, signalling his followers to attack. There were about forty youkais suddenly rushing into the room, trying to attack them.

            Only Sanzo and Goku fought, as Hakkai was glooming by himself. Every time when a youkai approaches Hakkai, it was either Sanzo or Goku there to help him. Hakkai did not even flinch when a youkaistood in front of him, bloodthirsty. He completely had no sign of life and response. He just sat there, eyes totally blank, as if he was a living corpse. "Kono kuso yaro!How dare you show no response upon _my_ presence! Is it because of this dead man? Then, let me help you out of this situation, by tearing him into pieces, so you'll _never_ see him _again_!"

            The ignorant youkai raised his sword and was about to pierce it into Gojyo's body, when Hakkai's eyes suddenly opened wide. Poor, ignorant youkai, he never knew that a devil was nearing him… A complete devil… "Unghh! What the—!" Without finishing his sentence, his head fell, dead. Hakkai pulled his hand back from the demon's body and the youkai fell on the ground. The whole of Hakkai's right hand was filled with blood, and some of the demon's blood was also splashed to Gojyo's face. 

            "No one, I say, _no one _can do that to my precious friend even he is _dead_!" Hakkai screamed at the youkai even though he was dead. He went to Gojyo's side and used his left hand to wipe the demon's blood away from Gojyo's face. "And get your dirty blood off him…" The others froze watching the scene in front of them. Even Sanzo froze, standing dumbfounded when he saw what Hakkai had done. Hakkai turned around, gazing at the other pesky insects. His eyes were narrow, and he shot a very cold, dangerous glance at them. He was about to kill. "Now, which one of you is ready…?" The other youkais got scared and all escaped. "Humph, I will get the sutra someday! I swear! Just you wait!" After saying, the leader also ran off.

            Sanzo and Goku went to Hakkai's side, both without saying a word, as they knew that was not the right time. Hakkai turned around and look at Gojyo. He smiled, much to the other couple's surprise. "Never mind Gojyo… I'll never let you be hurt again… Never…" After saying that, he collapsed. "Hakkai!" Both of them went to hold Hakkai up. He was probably too dejected and lack of sleep was what that made him that insubstantial. 

            After a few moments, Hakkai regained his consciousness. As he looked around blurrily, he spotted Gojyo on the bed, but there was _another _Gojyo standing, staring at Hakkai with a pair of worried garnets. He muttered something in a very low voice, but Hakkai could understand them all. "Hakkai, please don't mourn over my death… I'll never go happily with you like that… Just like I said, please continue this journey without me. And tell that baka saru to stop crying already… It hurts me to just look at him like that… Please bury my body right away, Hakkai… I don't want to be hurt again… I don't want to see you all in such depression anymore… I'll leave everything to you… I have faith… in you…"

            Then, he vanished. As soon as he disappeared from Hakkai's vision, he suddenly felt he could see everything clearly. He glanced around, probably finding the _alive_ Gojyo… but his attempts were to no avail. _Dream…? Or was it real…? Gojyo… _"Hakkai! Daijoubu desuka?" Goku went near him and asked with concern. Hakkai did not answer him and went to Gojyo's side. He looked at Gojyo's corpse. _As_ _I see you lie so lonely in front of me, the melancholy that flows from your back captivates me… I want to embrace you with a nonchalant love… But I can't… You'll never feel it… You'll never face me with that face anymore… Let me just grant you your last wish… _Though he was very weak, he still had the power to carry Gojyo in his arms. 

            "Oi, where you going taking HIM with you?" "I'm going to bury him…" "Nani!? Burying Gojyo this late at night? Why don't we wait till morning…? I still want to see him for a longer time… Hakkai…" "No. Gojyo told me to bury him right away… He doesn't want to be hurt! And this is the only thing which I can do for him…" Upon hearing that, Goku went to stop Hakkai from going out of the room. However, a hand stopped him abruptly, signalling him not to go any further. "Leave him alone… Just let him do it alone…" 

            Goku obeyed the monk as Hakkai walked out of the room while carrying Gojyo. Both of them could see every drop of tear plummeting from Hakkai's eyes onto Gojyo's body, drop by drop… It was as if they could see the blood tumbling from his heart too… Hakkai walked towards a small field just beside the inn they were staying and placed Gojyo on the ground. He looked up to the big, black, moonless and starless sky, which looked more like an abyss without an end. 
    
                   By that time, his tears had already ceased. He tried to yell on top of his lungs, but his throat seemed to have some problem. His voice could not come out no matter how hard he tried. Tears started to brim in his eyes brightly and they were poured out silently and yet so gracefully. _I wonder, why is the sky so vast? Even though I tried to yell, my voice didn't come, and the tears poured out. No matter how hard I try, I can never achieve what I really want now._
    
    He started to dig, then placed the body, and then cover him with soil. He headed back to the inn with his heart so painful as if it had stopped pumping blood, his chest were so tight that he thought his lungs were malfunctioning and he was not breathing. He went up the stairs and opened the door.
    
                   Once the door was opened the first thing he saw was Gojyo. He smiled. "Thank you, Hakkai… You will always be within me and please don't ever forget me, okay? Honto ni arigato…" After saying those words, he vanished into the thin air… again. Hakkai reached out his hand to grab him before letting him disappear, but he failed. "No… Gojyo…" He cried, while he was slowly falling to the ground.
    
                   Falling and falling. It was as if it took ages for him to fall to the ground. Thud. His head and body landed on the wooden floor. Sanzo and Goku went to his aid. Though he fainted, his mind was absolutely clear. _Feelings like sand falling through my hands and flying through my head… I can't capture any other feelings except for sorrow. "Continue this journey without me…" Back then, these words that pierced my heart, suddenly started to throb with pain………_ 
    
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    Fuuei: Hi! Hope you all review! I did my VERY best to write this chapter! And I hope there's no OOC in here…
    
    Goku: Err… Fuuei, I think you've made Hakkai too mad… Look at him now…
    
    Hakkai: * hugging a dummy * Gojyo! Don't die! Please DON'T die!!!!!
    
    Fuuei: Hakkai! Snap out of it already! Gojyo's right here!
    
    Hakkai: * Looks at Gojyo * No! You're NOT Gojyo! * points at dummy * HE IS GOJYO!
    
    All except Hakkai: He's mad…


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